The Next Chapter

When Alfonso left us, for a while it seemed as though he had left a hole that would be impossible to fill.  I have learned that each person is unique with their own gifts, callings, talents and strengths.  I have seen how each team member brings something new and special to our team- a something we wondered how we ever did without before!  Alfonso's something special had been with us so long that we couldn't even remember "before" and certainly couldn't imagine an "after".

However, he has been gone a month and a half now and in that time we have seen God do a work in each of us and in our team as a whole.

First, Yolanda, Chrissy, and I were forced to take on responsibilities that we had not had to worry with in the past.  Adding these challenges to our to-do list helped us to stretch, grow, and do things we didn't know we could do.  This was good.

Next, the Lord brought to our team a super young lady named Kimberly.  Kimberly has gifts and talents all her own.  Right now she is in the process of merging her talents with ours and we are seeing great things happen because of it.  This is good.

The most intriguing aspect of Kimberly's story is this...

When Alfonso came to us he was only a shadow of the person he grew to be.  Francisco and I feel as though the Lord has called and equipped us to train up others.  We saw this explicitly in Alfonso's life.  He was hesitant to step out of his comfort zone and take on responsibilities.  He had a volatile temper.  He was a bit of a class clown, not taking life or work very seriously.  But God had called him to more.  Under our tutelage (not that we take the credit for the work that God did) Alfonso grew to be an amazing leader who made solid decisions.  So much so that he is now in a position of much responsibility.

Wow.  We sowed and sowed into Alfonso's life.... and now someone else was reaping the benefit.  But so be it.  That is the way it is in the Kingdom of God.  We knew that Alfonso's season with us had its purpose and this new season had a purpose as well.

So, when Kimberly came along I thought how appropriate.  Kimberly and I have a history.  I began sowing into Kimberly's life when she was just 11 years old.  She is a former student of mine from a program in La Limonada, a marginal area of Guatemala City.  For 4.5 years I sowed into Kimberly's life daily, forming character, helping her and others to be the best they could be and all that God called them to be.  Now, 12 years later, she is married, has a baby girl and has almost finished college.  Often times we never see the results of what we have invested in others but this time I am privileged to be able to.

It is like a circle.  And I am glad to be a part of both the sending and receiving, the sowing and the reaping.  

So, we welcome Kimberly to our team.  We welcome her talents, her gifts, her callings and her something special.  We welcome this new chapter in Brazos Abiertos.

Brazos Abiertos Outreach Team from left to right: Kimberly, Chrissy, Yolanda, Sarah

When Worlds Collide

I sat gripping the warm coffee mug firmly in my hands as if it were a lifeline in a desperate attempt to clear my foggy brain.  The morning was not yet awake, nor anyone in my house, and this time of day when I usually relish my time alone with the Lord was more of a torture this morning as I willed my exhausted body and mind into action.

I was nearly through with a two weeks of back to back visiting mission teams.  If you have read my earlier blogs you will know that I love mission teams.  I am in my element during both the planning and execution of such a visit.  Yet even my favorite part of ministry is, at times, at odds with my "other world".

Since my eyes were too blurry to read my Bible I began to think back over the struggles, trials, and victories of the past days.  I chuckled as I remembered the night that I got to bed late finishing up spread sheets and budgets for the next team only to awaken once to comfort a teething toddler, then later to rush in a pick-up a pre-schooler from the floor where he had fallen out of bed, and then been up for the day when the toddler woke up up again at 5am to start his day.  Regardless of the lack of sleep I had a full day of ministry to fulfill.  I recalled  how many times during the past week and a half I had been gone all day and returned in the late evening with two tired boys and dinner still to cook.  I shook my head in dismay as I remembered the times I was tempted to pour bowls of cereal for supper!  But my husband who also worked hard all day wouldn't have appreciated that very much.

...and the afternoon when I was told the presence of God was strong and the children were deeply moved and ministered too- but I missed it because we had cupcakes to prepare for a school party and homework to do. 

...Night after night of waking up with Cohen whose molars were bothering him followed by day after day of trying to accomplish more than humanly possible.  Dragging the children to banking errands, ministry sites, and other related places and still hoping they would have super human strength and not be tired and cranky by the end of the day.  Daily going over the pre-school calendar to keep up with projects and special events, and still forgetting some of them anyway! 

It had been 10 days of holding down 2 full-time jobs... and not always successfully!  It had been 10 days of joys, disappointments, struggles, victories, trials, tests of patience, and faith in God.  It had been a time to see the best of me and the worst of me.  A time for my strengths to shine and sometimes for my weaknesses to be embarrassingly exposed.  It had been 10 days when I wondered why my family still needed so much of me when I obviously had my hands full with other things...and at the same time wondered why ministry was so demanding when my family obviously still needed to eat, sleep, and do well at school/work.

...and I still had a few more days to go!

So, in those last few minutes before my little crew began to stir I sat aside my coffee cup which had now grown lukewarm and I  began to pray.  I prayed for renewed strength, patience, understanding with my kids (we were all worn to a frazzle), and good attitudes all around!  As the early light of the sun began to peek through the clouds I remembered that His mercy is new every morning!  His mercy for my life was new at that very moment.  I began my day rejoicing in God's abundant mercy poured out to me and reveled in His grace for my life.  Because even though there are times when my 2 worlds collide and I feel weak and unable to meet the challenge I know that His grace is sufficient for me.  He has called me at this time to this place to fulfill this purpose, and God himself is preparing me to meet that challenge.

I am sure many of you reading this can relate.  Not only missionaries face this struggle.  Many mothers feel torn between the many roles they play and the needs that pull on their time and energy.  May we all pray for one another and encourage each other in the Lord.  His grace is sufficient.  He is the source of all that we need.  When we feel the situation is too great for us, let us remember that it is not too great for Him.

Worlds Apart

brotherly fun, playing with water

As I sat in the shade and watched the tops of the tall pines sway and dance in the breeze I felt contentment wash over me like a warm bath.  My two boys were utterly enjoying the park that afternoon.  I sighed as work and ministry felt worlds apart, the chaos left behind for this moment in time as I immersed myself totally in motherhood.

boys and dirt

Some of my favorite moments of the day are spent with my little ones.  I relish lunchtime chats with my four-year-old.  His perspective on life is so fresh and new.  He finds joy in small things.  As he talks about his morning and laughs at silly jokes I find myself so thankful that my schedule allows me to spend lunch nearly every day with my little guy.  Watching my toddler discover something new, something I often take for granted (like belly buttons!) is fascinating.  It is easy to get lost in this world and totally forget that the other exists.

Yet as I sit here at my desk this morning I see beside me a spiral block of notes with a list a mile long of things I need to accomplish (preferably today).  Calling an interpreter to set up dates for a mission team, calling the bus driver, update the website (oh, well, I haven't gotten to that for 3 years, I am sure it can wait), update spreadsheets for the book keeper, fill out a 10 page form that the U.S. government wants for CCJ, file receipts for the accountant here in Guatemala, write thank-you notes, nail down details of mother's day event, make bank deposits, add names to the mailing list, a dozen more phone calls, and the list goes on and on....

Sitting here in the middle of a stack of paperwork it is oh, so easy to forget that my little bubble of motherhood exists!   I can feel the adrenaline begin to surge again.  My missionary side begins to yawn and stretch, waking up and taking over.  I remember something I saw in my Bible reading and I want to jot it down to share at a team meeting.  I begin to think about churches I will visit and what I will share on our next trip to the States.  It is all so exciting.  I love the ministry.  I love missions.  I love helping others, sharing the gospel, planting seeds of hope and eternity.

My two worlds, my two realities... at times they coexist in harmony and at times they seem at war with each other... tune in again to see what happens when two worlds collide!

a whole different world